All non binary people are lovely and valid, but man, people who physically pass as nb are on another level. Like when you look at them and
you just draw a blank on their gender. Amazing.
America might be close to being able to support a post-work society, but there are a lot of countries that are not, and so I can't in good
conscience support laziness.
Even Lewis reporting a bug to the live editor like it's 2015, so cute.
I have a bad habit of posting quotes here unattributed,
most often because context doesn't matter compared to the power of the words. For example, [this quote](cf045c64-f54f-423f-b682-52b99c7294d2) ("You may be looking at the last person in America not online") sounds so fricking good. But it also means that I'm trusting myself to remember where the quote came from. I've been racking my brain, and I can't remember who the Last Person in America Not Online is. It's not indexed by Google (except for this page). Nothing in my browser history from that day is promising. (Except for me searching for that phrase?) Yet the quote was definitely written out online in some context. (Probably an image posted to Reddit, then?) The Internet is a weird place.
“Jesus said, ‘If my followers remain quiet, the very stones will cry out.’”
-Luke 19:40, paraphrased
I just want to be alone.
I can't survive in this world of other people.
One of these days, someone is going to punch me because I don’t want to talk to them.
WHY. WHY. Why can't we make software that works!! !1‽‽‽? Please! Someone explain to me! There's a bug open in MultiMC that has been open for
2 years! And there's a PR that will fix it open on Github and the maintainer won't merge it! Because they insist that it's Apple's fault and not their fault and they shouldn't have to fix their application. And I just want to be able to CLICK the BUTTON in MultiMC without the application freezing!!!!! I'm so done. I want to delete the KA Extension but Luke won't let me. Because I'm part of the problem. My code is awful garbage too! Please.
I would never buy cryptocurrency, please.
All my XMR is mined myself.
I like doing weird things.
When I say I have poor time management skills, what it means that I have an executive functioning issue.
"When I say I'm insane, what it means is that I have bad time management skills.": https://twitter.com/Matthias_4910/status/1233980268970594309
Thinking of the Bill Wurtz quote, ‘insanity is a skill I have’
You have to be able to push yourself. But you also have to know when to push yourself. Edit: https://twitter.com/Matthias_4910/status/1250315557791887360
Why would anyone text me? Why would anyone tell me what was going on?
I am not a dog; I am a sheep.
Please read all of this website: https://m1racles.com. Please. It's such a fricking trip.
Game of Thrones was on track to be one of the greatest TV shows of all time.
Didn't realize I was like 2 weeks behind on emails :/
I just finished the second Mistborn. My Dad was like, 'no it doesn't end on a cliffhanger.' Sanderson, in the last chapter:
everything we know is a lie we just accidentally unleashed an unknown evil on the land please buy book 3 if you want any answers :)
Sometimes you have to do dumb things.
On people who watch Minecraft Youtube videos: "Many of the viewers are North American schoolchildren in the 10-13 age range, a lot of them
are behaviorally challenged, and the majority are dealing with some form of parental neglect." 42 votes, 2 awards. Posted by the moderator a subreddit about a Minecraft Youtube series. Like, that is something you say. You can say 'most people who watch Minecraft videos are abused, autistic, children.' I'm struggling here.
Going to the dentist. Hopefully they let me keep my tongue.
Just remembered that the GRIBFILEs existed. Man. What drugs was Ethan on?
I'm still waiting for Ethan to fulfill his duty, and give us GRIBFILE 2.
I forget sometimes that Mac has spotlight and I can use it search for files in a pre-indexed way. I try to craft complicated `find` commands
Get on my level
It's impossible to update Django. I'm switching to storing user data in files, writing scripts in lisp, and running them with werc.
Honestly, so many bugs and issues that I can avoid by re-installing all macOS shell utilities through brew. Bye bye 2016 `less`.
This is a healthy backup schedule, right?
``` $ l -1 backups 2017-06-30.sql 2017-08-24.sql 2019-02-10.sql 2019-04-14.sql 2019-06-04.sql 2019-06-05_1.sql 2019-06-05_2.sql 2019-06-05_3.sql 2021-05-23.sql ```
There's *always* a temptation to group files by type, and I've just never found it to be a good idea. It makes the code easy, sure, but it's
more intuitive to have files that relate to each other in the same place, rather than with files of the same type, that might have completely different content. Like you shouldn't put your images in one folder and your text in another. You should make one folder for each post, and have the images and text for that post in it.
I have 3 SSH connections open to Luther* right now.
*my Linode server, which hosts OJSE as well as other things, like Discord bots and this website.
It will be cool when humanity finally achieves wireless printing.
About a week or two ago I started running all my web traffic through an SSH proxy tunnel. It's surprising nice to know just that my IP can't
be used to track my location. It hasn't noticeably affected my internet speed either, but I have fast internet.
I feel taller here because of the higher elevation. It means Earth's gravity is weaker. It means I have more space.
Yeah, so I just found that on paper, not sure when I wrote it, probably a month or two ago.
This is an exercise. An exercise in pain. An exercise in art.
Multitasking, focused, ignoring. 2 things at once. Under stimulated. Overstimulated. Bored, lonely, scared, uncomfortable. Flying through nothing, unmoving. Unthinking. I cannot, in light of my overwhelming pride, allow myself to think other people's thoughts. I cannot listen. Two things at once. Overthinking. Slow. They're slow. They talk about nothing. The brain. Liminal. "It's not just easy." This is an exercise in pain. Conciseness. Flow. Always moving, throbbing, pushing forward. Moving where? Why can't we teleport there? Stop the beating around the brush, the repetition, the pain. The why! I want the why. I want depth, not this endless breadth. This endless, unmoving, breadth. I've run out of energy to argue, to question; I just ignore. It gets harder, but instead of moving faster, it moves slower.
Girl I just found the most high quality emo rant, give me a second to transcribe it.
I don’t think I’ve been in a pool or other body of water in like, at least a year.
“emphasising the composition of generic and reusable (pure value returning) library functions” *reimplements Haskell in JS*
I think the relation that AJR describes in "Joe" is perhaps more universally found in with regard to a parent or older sibling.
"Always down to hang, he had no time" -Joe, AJR
2 of my currently open tabs: Wikipedia, on Executive dysfunction, and Random.org, which I just used to schedule my night.
No energy, no thoughts.
The Count of Monte Cristo: *makes a philosophical comment*
*Paraphrase from Chapter 48: Ideology* Villefort, the King's Attorney, responsible for overseeing the courts of France: Why do you philosophize. If I, like you, had nothing better to do, I would do something more interesting. The Count: Do you really think you have better things to do? Villefort, shaken: Perhaps, since you have spent so much time in countries less civilized than France, you are unfamiliar with our justice system. (Okay, Villefort is more racist in the book.) The Count: In fact, I have made a philosophical examination of the justice systems of all the countries of the world. I find that those more primitive nations, which use the law of retaliation, do better a better job of achieving justice, as measured against the law of God. Human inventions march from complex to simple, and simplicity is always perfection. So perhaps then you will have nothing to do. Villefort: Maybe so, but until then, I spend a lot of time studying our complicated laws. The Count: Sure, you might know the laws of France, but I also know the laws of the Enlgish, Turkish, Japanese, and Hindu. And so I'm right in saying that you haven't done anything, since I've done so much more relative to you. (I can't handle this book. It's all like this, you have to parse the 1800s grammar, but then it's just The Count roasting the hell out of everyone. Nothing advances the plot, it's just The Count toying with his food. It's not subtle at all.) The Count: "I see that in spite of [your] reputation...as a superior man, you look at everything from the...most narrow view which it is possible for human understanding to embrace." Villefort: Waht (It keeps going. I can't! The Count is like, I'm the enlightened of God, and Villefort gets sassy with him.) Villefort: "Excuse me if I was unaware that I should meet with a person whose knowledge so far surpasses the usual knowledge and understanding of men." It's rare for "us corrupted wretches of civilization" to get to meet someone like you. The Count: Really, you couldn't tell I was special? I thought you were a discerning person. (That's how I paraphrased it. The text is "do you never use your eyes?") (The Count alludes to angles here.) Villefort: So you believe in angles of God. The Count: Of course, I am one. (I have to cut The Count's monologue here. If you want to read it, I'll happily send you a picture. The highlight is "What men call the chances of fate—namely ruin, change, circumstance—I have fully anticipated.") Villefort: So then you're the only perfect person? The Count: "No, not perfect, only impenetrable." (It keeps going! I have to stop here. It's your loss that you don't get to hear about how The Count sold his soul to Devil to become the hand of God.)
"unwin the underbracket. crown the underchampions."
Started filling out the form to make an appointment with a counselor, before giving up, for the 4th time.
Hm, almost like I have an executive functioning issue. Maybe I should talk to a councilor about that.
I'm sick of Hugo and want to go back to Jekyll but the <10ms compile times are addicting. Jekyll feels like I'm compiling C now.
Who's hyped for this season of Blaseball!!?
I am so fricking done! Can we just, as a community of programmers, slow the frick down! And fix some bloody bugs!!!!!
Software doesn't have to have bugs. It is possible to make bug free software. And yet! EVERY SINGLE PROGRAM has bugs. Please!
Man I hate small plants. I love big plants. Huge plants! Trees! Let the plants grow.
“You May Be Looking At The Last Person In America Not Online”
Is it possible to enjoy being slapped in the face?
Fear makes people do some wack things.
Oh my word my brain is so slow.
The mere act of summarizing or omitting information can be problematic.
60 Minutes cut an interview with DeSantis in a way that has caused me to re-lose a fair amount of faith in the main-stream media. (I really don't like PolitiFact's "If Your Time is Short," I recommend skipping down and reading both transcripts.) https://www.politifact.com/article/2021/apr/07/unpacking-edits-60-minutes-report-ron-desantis-flo. I couldn't find clips from either 60 Minutes or The Florida Channel that were free from biased analysis, but I recommend watching the full clips if you can. The media has not learned from their poor coverage of Trump and is continuing to value a narrative over sharing facts. Please just give me the facts and let me decide for myself. I will continue to reject headlines at face value.
I think fungi are neat and we should allocate a large portion of the U.S. military budget to studying them.
I have said previously, that I would not be willing to work for the U.S. military in any capacity. I would make an exception if they paid me to study fungi.
Oh my word, I want a Thomas-the-Train-universe, dark, possibly horror, story, about a train that figured out how to leave the track.
I say I'm not ambitious, but that's a lie. I'm way too ambitious. I want to do so much. But I also know I can't do one-tenth of the things I
want to do, so I stop myself, and moreover, I hide that I want to those things.
"When I program in other languages, even ones I know well, I feel like I’ve flown to Jupiter. Gravity is so strong that every step is a
struggle. In Lisp, you can dance."
“I want a vaccine, but what I want even more are magic beans I can plant in my arm that will grow into a beanstalk my sons can climb if
they ever run out of hope.”
"a testament to the vast indifference of humanity"
"we never talk about [our high IQ] and even refused to become members of the MENSA"
People think weighted averages are difficult. I love weighted averages, I can do them in my sleep.
Isn't it strange how the form of something is different from its content?
Because labels can lie and time is an illusion.
I want to tell stories. I want to feel.
I had a form I needed to fill out that I didn’t want to fill out, so stayed awake until now. Yeah. The form is done and I will now sleep.
The problem with defining insanity is that it implies a statistically significant deviation from the norm. This requires defining not just
the norm, but also the standard or acceptable deviation from it.
I'm going to be okay. I don't need, like, sleep.
Like, on one hand, I know I'm not a bad person. On the other hand, bad people don't think that they're bad people.
I don't even know what I'm procrastinating from doing anymore. I think there was like a form I needed to fill out or something.
I'm like, IDEs are so bad and inflexible, but like, I want to leave my `<p>` unclosed for humorous and rhetorical reasons.
"When one ceases to feel, I am of the opinion one should keep quiet." "I do not take particular note of the empty moments of my life"
"The first sentence will come spontaneously, so compelling is the truth" -The Surrealist Manifesto
I am re-reading but a few chapters of *The Count of Monte Cristo*. It cannot handle it, this was a mistake.
Morrel is like 'death before dishonor', and picks up a pistol to kill himself. His son walks in, 'what horrible violence is the pistol for?' Morrel: 'We have no money. Our debts will not be paid and the name of Morrel will be dishonored!' His son: "You are right father; I understand you." "There is one for you and one for me—thanks!" You can't make this stuff up. The book is fricking wild.
Everything is a tweet. My posts on Mastodon: tweets. My posts here: tweets. Funny Tumblr posts screencapped and posted to Reddit: tweets.
The internet owes me more than an apology.
Maybe my cookies just need someone to sit and watch them while they bake. Maybe they’re lonely. Maybe they’re overcooked.
Ah, my nemesis, the chocolate chip cookie, has defeated me for a fourth time.
I’m being dramatic of course, they’re not bad. They’re just not flat like I want them to be. Maybe my standards are too high. But the pictures from the recipe I’m following end up with fricking pancakes, and I have these domes of cookie. Maybe my expectations are too high.
Not me, casually sleeping for 12 hours.
(This is my first time uploading audio here, hopefully everything works.)
I’m envious of artists.
I am obsessed with PDFs. Like, they're just so fricking there.
My life goal is to be the statue from "The Statue Got Me High." Just a monolith of stone that intoxicates people and then disintegrates them
Thinking about Mr. Right (2015). Talk about a movie.
The trailer almost doesn't do it justice because it spoils everything, and it doesn't have the right pacing. It's almost Douglass-Adams-esque, in that it jumps around wildly, but it flows between pieces well. As opposed to Dirk Gently (ooof, I can't really pull in a Douglass-Adams work as my "as-opposed-to." Screw it, I mean the TV show, I haven't read the book.) which jumps around erratically, with no flow. This Thought is very difficult to parse, I'm sorry. I don't care enough to re-write it.
"And though I once preferred a human being's company, they pale before the monolith that towers over me"
-The Statue Got Me High, They Might Be Giants
"The following item(s) will be renewed."
“They’re people who are convinced that they are too special for rules, and too smart for education. They don’t regard themselves as inhabiting the world the way other people do; they’re secret royalty, detached from society’s expectations and unfailingly outraged when faced with normal consequences for bad decisions. Society, and especially economics, is a logic puzzle where you just have to find the right set of loopholes to win the game. Rules are made to be slipped past, never stopping to consider why someone might have made those rules to start with.”
JS has `==`, `===`, and `Object.is`. I thought that was bad. Lisp has `EQ`, `EQL`, `EQUAL`, `EQUALP`, `=`, `CHAR=`, etc for other types
Lisp was a mistake. Like, I should learn it, but man, who ever created it made a mistake.
"That's either very cool or very scary depending on your point of view."
We just put a loop inside of a format string. Lisp is wild.
The Lisp people are all, 'There's no point writing lisp unless you're writing it in emacs'
"Common Lisp should be used with an IDE made for interactive development, otherwise you lose a key feature." Iconic. I'll stick with the REPL for the time being
Help I can't figure out how to close `sbcl`.
Yes I am learning lisp. Every lisp programmer acts like every other language is hell. And like, Rust has fanboys who tell you that your language is worse. The lisp people are like, 'go for it, but I would rather write it in lisp' and that sounds powerful.
I collect sentences
"The best cherries I have ever eaten came from a street vendor in Paris"
I want to have conversations about code. I wish people on GitHub talked to me.
It makes me happy to know there are still people that care about swings.
Man, I wish I had muffins right now.
I mean, they're in the oven, but I want them now.
How do I know if I’m a real person?
I cut up a rubber band and put it under the feet of my bed because my bed would slide on the hard wood if I sat up against the wall.
I want to watch Polar Express
I do see exciting future, but they're big things and they're far away. I need something to motivate me now.
Last night I started thinking about Russel's teapot again and I think I utterly confused myself. What's the point of the thought experiment?
Something about how God doesn't exist because we can't prove Him to exist with science. But I thought the teapot thing was supposed to be an atheist position. But it only serves to prove that there are questions that science can't answer. I don't know, I don't get it.
At some point I convinced myself that wanting to have a relationship with women is misogynist.
Like, if the interest is one-sided, then that's more than just awkward, I've actually been sexist. A little like https://xkcd.com/642/, but not just for random girls on public transport, but also for literally anyone. They have a right to professionalism and if I try to bring my personal life into the conversation, I've violated that right. I guess I've only talked to 4 girls in-person in the last year, but that's mostly due to COVID. On the flip side, if I try to start a romantic relationship with someone that I've known longer than 3 months, then I'm scared of https://xkcd.com/513. Man xkcd is too accurate with these things. "Am I ready for love? Or maybe just a best friend, should there be a difference, do you have instructions?" -Turning Out, AJR
People don't understand that I have executive functioning issues. I cannot do anything except on impulse. I'm terrified of making a mistake.
I think this is my whole generation, but I don't want to project. Everyone is all, "sign up" for whatever. Like, that's an extra click, my odds of doing whatever you're inviting me to do have decreased by 90%. I can't take it. I'm just broken. I can't imagine social interaction at all.
I have literally never regretted not using Oh My Zsh. Vanilla ZSH for me.
The could be us but you playing https://youtu.be/xUiDT3CjA40
Slept for like 14 hours.
The Basecamp story is a microcosm of our society.
I can take pills easily without water.
Might just go to bed
Might need to rewrite the About page for this website for a third time before sharing it.
It's 2021 and my standards are still impossibly high.
Drinking water to replace the water being lost through my eyes.
There are way too many fricking markdown libraries when you consider that they're all bad.
I can't tell if my eyes are watering because of allergies or if I'm actually crying.
A figure stands in a doorway, hands on the frame on either side. Behind them, light streams out into the darkness. They lean forward, a bit
farther than they meant to. They start to fall forward, and have to move their hands to grasp the air in order to regain their balance.
When were the TypeScript developers like "let's just keep all the types for all the packages in one repository"?
Oh shoot I forget 'this situation is the result of US intervention in Central America'
'Well actually, the number of children in cages has gone down significantly during Biden's presidency.'
'The two party system is fundamentally flawed. The only person that can bring real change is Bernie, which why I voted for him.' 'The US has always been right-wing.' 'Nothing ever changes'
Had like a 300 word change-log here but Viv crashed and I lost it so you just have to guess what I changed.
I'll give you a hint, I reduced the main page file size to 6% of what it was.
These Altoids do things to my sinuses. I haven't yet decided whether they're good things.
There are all these ideas that not only exist only in my head but also only exist when I am thinking about them. Scary.
I may or may not be picking fights on Reddit just to feel something.
The person in the zoom chat addressing me by name to let me know I'm unmuted. Ah! Human interaction, how long it's been!
Man, I wish I was a real person.
"I'm like the best at being the worst."
I sometimes fall into the trap of thinking that my sanity is correlated with my productivity, which is not the case.
"If you need to prepare, it's not going to be any fun"
How am I just now figuring out that x selectors are a thing?
"do files have rights?"
Are you an inhale or an exhale person? I’m inhale
I hate time and I hate money.
This is my 1177th thought here. Someone should do the math to figure out when I’ll pass my Twitter.
Someone needs to set up a meta website curating my thoughts.
There are not so many paths as you might think
Me: Haven’t you heard the good news of Gödel’s Incompleteness Theorem? Formal logic is dead. Mathematicians: That’s not really–
Me: LOGIC IS LOGICALLY FLAWED! SURREALISM WINS AGAIN!
You’re trying to prove all toads are frogs? Idiot. Don’t you know that Gödel’s Incompleteness Theorem states that under any system of
formal logical complex enough to prove toads are frogs will also include paradox? Logic is dead. Help by establishing a societal system for punishing people abusing toads.
The other day my allergies were really bad, so my nose was running, and I was wearing a mask. Let me tell you, not fun.
It takes a very long time to happen, but I am starting to reach the point where I am fatigued from looking too much stuff up on the internet
Thinking about overdosing on Loratadine
That's allergy medicine, I think if I overdosed on it I'd just fall asleep.
I live off of muffins.
I think I've eaten 7 muffins in the last 24ish hours. Could be higher.
"The quiz will go and become a pumpkin"
Drinking milk directly from the jug is a singular experience, wholly different from drinking from a glass.
Information is key
It was not clear why we must do the opposite of whatever Google did, but the world is a strange place
Wearing sunglasses to keep the hair out of my eyes.
“I think I know where all my problems come from, California”
-Dreams and Boxes, Watsky
One of the coffee mugs that says "Don't talk to me until I've had my coffee" but it just says "Don't talk to me"
I don’t need answers, I need sleep.
I value consistency very highly, but sometimes that leads to me missing opportunities to make things better, because I don't want to risk
"I keep losing my socks / where the hell do they go / I bet they're finally free"
-Adventure Is Out There, AJR
People who try to gatekeep reading infuriate me to no end.
designed to encourage functional paradigms. It's strictly typed, and places an even greater value on type-safety than TypeScript. Much like Rust, it's designed to be similar to common, modern languages, while still being compiled and taking advantages of the safety that results. (It's of course garbage collected, since it compiles to JS.) Syntax is similar to JS. Prominently, all primitive variables are constants; if you want a mutable value you have to wrap it in an object. It encourages pure functions, doesn't have any `null` or `undefined` types, and (in most cases) can infer types without needing type annotations. Because of compiler time optimizations, it boasts faster run times and smaller source files than comparable JS. The compiler is written in OCaml.
"Matthias can you pls change the notif settings in the server so it doesn't ping every time someone writes something?"
Sometimes I forget I have a nose.
Lemons don’t have any rights
"And by the way, it's supposed to be funny. Something that has all but vanished from serious music these days"
-Gatekeeper Julie (feat. Jim Svejda), Capital Cities
Some very exciting things planned for this website. Nothing you’ll see just yet, but very soon.
"Your audio is like 2 fps"
Me, trying not to curse at how fricking sexy the new iMac looks. Hot fricking dang.
e.e. cummins’s ghost possessed someone to write SCP-3999. It is so beautiful.
Honestly it's so weird living with other people and getting to know them. One of my roommates has been to McDonalds "once or twice."
One of my roommates never lets her computer die. I'd sit in a McDonalds until my computer ran out of battery without thinking twice.
"Avoid success at all costs"
"Who needs a song when you can scream"
-The Opportunist, The Garages
241 tabs open on my phone. I wonder if I should close some?
word-salad-yo-mama-jokes on Tumblr is peak humor. If you disagree you are welcome to go back to watching sit coms and not talking to me.
I live my life absolutely consumed by fear of 3 things: other people, failure, and losing control of myself.
FVDisco. Absolute fricking legend.
Thinking about reading Le Mis, just as an escape from this world into a land of fiction for a while.
My throat is so tired from talking.
"I often mix my capitalization in informal text, to signal informality"
Someone in the Vivaldi Discord made the mistake of linking to Min browser, and I'm very impressed.
The conversation happening in the live chat room for supportXMR is quality. I unfortunately cannot share it here, since it is NSFW.
I hate tables. No one should be doing tables. If you think about tables, you see tables everywhere. But most people don't.
Everyone is trying 'websites that look like applications' (PWA, electron) but no one has tried 'applications that look like websites.'
Here's a weird idea I've had for a bit. It's hard to describe, but imagine a browser that supported plugins for other file types.
Why has no one written a WYSITUTWYG editor yet?
*I found one from 7 years ago written in closure and probably abandoned*
Apparently it's rude to post existential thoughts without context, "vague blogging." Heck that I do what I want here
Send me ETH 0xB08b71160698A5182Cbb1099D5cd101c07B13D555 ty bye
OK Orchestra goes almost too hard. I feel like I can't listen to it without headphones.
"I thought I had the ADHD, but that's a real thing, and I'm just lazy"
I had a dream that I was in a forest of metals trees that were Queen songs. There was a snake, and I grabbed the snake behind
the head, like you're supposed to, and the snake was also ranked bedwars all star player nohuh. And my grip slipped, and the snake scooted forward and was able to turn its head like 90º, but couldn't quite bite me. But I was worried that if I brought my other hand over, it would be able to bite me, and I couldn't, like adjust my grip to where I was holding it safely again without my other hand. So I'm just squeezing this snake behind the neck, pretty hard, because I don't want it to slip out. I considered just squeezing super hard and trying to kill it, to be safe, but that's very against the morals of the recreational snake hunting club that I'm in. Because if you kill all the snakes then you can't catch them anymore. And then I woke up.
I really value consistency. Even though I wasn't watching Bill Wutrz in 2014, it makes me happy that I can go back and find his videos from
then and they're the same as they are now. It makes me feel better about saying that I like him or his content. I trust that his content accurately reflects what he wants to be making, as opposed to just trends, and makes me optimistic that he will continue making similar content in the future. Anyways, watch this: https://youtu.be/TgZH9s788mQ
Considering adding an audio portion to this website.
I bought a microphone because I want people to listen to me.
Still getting over the fact that we multiply matrixes from left to right.
Where did all the happy people go?
Just heard "Stressed Out" being played in public. Timer resets
Become Catholic, become pope, start a crusade, conquer Istanbul, rename it to Constantinople. This is a joke.
Why can't I go back to Constantinople?
You thought I was real on here, lol no, my real thoughts apparently go into voice memos. I have some wild voice memos I don't even remember.
Thinking about becoming a voice actor.
I could spend my whole life, all my energy, just fixing problems. Never making anything new.
Hundreds of static site generators on https://jamstack.org/generators/ and they're all bad.
Thinking about Rigby again.
I bullied Illumina into taking down his video. We win these!
There's like 4 levels of context here, I don't want to give one level of context, but I also don't want to explain everything.
It's creepy to me how similar Death Cab For Cutie and The Decemberists are. Exactly the same sound
Listening to the album Mink Car. Too good, too good.
"I'm only holding your hand, so I can look at your bangs" -Bangs, They Might Be Giants
Honestly, it's so refreshing to browse XKCD.com and not have to worry about "sure, this comic is good, but is it good enough to like/voteup"
When you're a kid, there's this distinction between things that happen to your body as a result of the passage of time (growing)
and things that happen as a result of your actions. There's a weird period from 25-45 where your body doesn't really change except for as a result of your action. And then you start seeing changes as a result of the passage of time again. But we don't call that growing, we call it aging or something.
I made brownies. The only problem with them is that there's not enough brownie per brownie.
The box-mix brownies are super fricking thin when poured into a 9"x13".
Ah, if I didn’t have shame, the texts I could send.
GEB is just like, ‘let’s imagine a computer with words of 36 bits.’ I’m so confused. Why not 32?
“When a computer program is running, it can be viewed on a number of levels. On each level, the description is given in the language of computer science, which makes all the descriptions similar in some ways to each other...” 287
Life just comes at you so fast.
I just want like 1 brain cell, please.
KA finally fixed the bug that led to quotes being over-escaped in bios. It only took them like 4 years.
I just can't be a normal person.
I'm just so disappointed in myself.
"It's alright, I really think I peaked in high school" -80's Films, Jon Bellion
Words have power, and you can argue or pretend like they don't as much as you want, but they do.
I feel like everyday I crush my dreams
"Are we truly doing things from a space of joy or merely because they once brought us comfort?"
What is man without his WiFi but a poor little bundle of meat.
My last Thought was a joke. I have no shame. I just implemented multiple dispatch in JS and I fully intend to use it in the future.
Someone just said "non sequitur," but meant "oxymoron." shaking my head my head
I have decided turning completeness was a mistake; I need to learn Iris.
Just opened my window and got a very nice breath of fresh air. It took me by surprise, how cool and fresh the air smelled. 10/10
I hate entropy. Entropy is the fricking worst. Why can't entropy decline? This is dumb.
Adding a social life is so fricking stressful. Like, do I enjoy it, sure. Do I need some more social interaction, probably. But that doesn’t
make it any easier.
Hello, I am a normal, functioning, adult human, and I would like you to commit to spending time with me
I fricking love this website.
Fun date idea: Open https://thoughts.learnerpages.com and read my thoughts. There's guaranteed to be some conversation starters in there
The British pronunciation of Tunisia sounds so wrong.
I would like to read fiction again. But alas. G.E.B. sits atop my stack of books.
Why are words hard? I spend so much time around words and they're still difficult.
Why am I such a bad writer? Why can't I write well?
I enjoy writing so much, but no one enjoys reading what I've written.
Climbing isn't hard. The hard part is not falling.
I feel like everyone was like 'I'm so bored we should totally do an April fools joke this year' and then no one motivated to do any. (@me)
Art is a myth.
My problems: I don't have enough time. I'm not an artist. My nails are too long. I'm not a good enough writer. I haven't read the material. I don't have enough time. My parters don't share my vision.
I really fricking want to be wierd. And in some ways, I'm sure everybody does, and I tell myself that I need to keep myself together and act
normal because everyone else does. But also, I go on Omegle and I say weird things, and they disconnect instantly. In a safe, anonymous environment, I can't think of people being weird. Like, I just want to scream gibberish and do a handstand and throw things. Does no one else?
"You never had a mother. You only have this knife, these hands, this screaming that has been echoing for generations"
I’m always like, ‘I want banana bread. I will make banana bread’ and then I do, and then I put it in the oven and have to wait an hour and
fifteen minutes. I’m just sitting here longing for the banana bread that I made but cannot eat for another 60 minutes.
HALF ALIVE DROPPING MUSIC TODAY!!!!!! HYPE!!!! AJR and half alive in the same week is too much, I'm dead
"Joe" has grown on me so much. Now that I understand the lyrics they’re super relatable
The Trick has also grown on me, but I still don't like the effect on the vocals.
“All our troubles gone, like when we were young, take me back to where we all began”
Hot takes on Discord.
'Discord is a malware distribution platform.' 'Discord does do anything special for gamers, gamers are just smart enough to fix the problem'
It has been a couple of days. I have finished part 1 of G.E.B.
I have decided its genius lies in daring to venture closer to insanity than any other work of reason.
When I say all software is bad, I don’t mean that every software responses poorly to good input.
Making software that responds to good input is easy. Making software that does exactly what you want is easy. But there are so few softwares that do everything well. That respond well to all inputs. I think that ties to Godel’s Theorem, but I haven’t finished GEB yet.
Why are humans so concerned with what other humans think of them?
I can render my markdown on the client side, where it takes 1.5 seconds, or on the server, where it takes 3 seconds. I hate this.
The issue is the images that I’m in-lining take forever to render as text on the client, and HTML layout has to finish before JS can run. So I was going to move it to the server, but the Python markdown library is just slow, to no one’s surprise. All software is bad, and anyone who says otherwise is trying to sell you software.
“God is better than the very best thing that the world has to offer”
-How Great, Chance the Rapper
I wish there was a genre like 'musical music.' Not that I ever listen to music from musicals, but it seems like a lot of the music I listen
to, especially AJR, would fit in better in a musical sound track than with other "Pop Hits."
"Goodbye ordinaryish people, we had quite the run didn’t wе though, but you gotta be somebody sometimе"
-Ordinaryish People, AJR
Me, pouring sugar from the bag into my waffles.
So much fricking code I want to write so quickly and I can't write all of it.
The thing about analyzing AJR is that they have such a broad range, that there's "doesn't sound like other AJR songs" and there's
"doesn't sound like AJR" and they are completely different things. "Ordinaryish People" has sounds that I've literally never heard before. It doesn't sound like anything else. But it sounds like AJR, because what other band is going to give a dubstep remix of the Blue Man Group's unconventional acoustic instruments.
OKO is definitely weirder than Neotheater, which is a good thing, AJR music is supposed to be weird.
"I try so hard to be so happy, are you happy too?"
-Christmas in June, AJR
No, this is broken OP, you can't give Ryan this many sounds, he's too powerful.
"Let's blame my parents 'cause they taught us their ways"
-3 O'Clock Things, AJR
The pure irony of me staying up an hour later than I would otherwise to listen to 3 O'Clock Things, which describes the futility of staying
up until 3AM.
AJR REALLY SAY "STAY IN SCHOOL KIDS"
The leaves on the OK ORCHESTRA album art are animated! 9/10
I love #cat-v because someone comes in trying to start a conversation with a Stallman petition, and everyone ignores them.
They are clowning on me for using plan9 utilities. I this person wants me to use the full OS or bust. I ask for help, and they're like, 'that's how it's supposed to work.'
I could self-host a Mattermost instance and make people come to my website to talk to me.
For any choice between 2 reasonable solutions, there is a 3rd solution that has all the advantages of both, at the cost of twice the work.
Open source is good for open source developers. That doesn’t mean open source is the best for the software.
If you don’t have modes, the editing process is always live. In vi, undo is clear. In word, how much does undo undo?
A data store that is neither declarative or imperative. The set of data *and* the fundamental operators on those data.
Man, the half of the #cat-v IRC channel that I understand is pure gold.
> literally the only reason to use git is peer pressure. therefore I assume that all git users are also addicted to drugs
Binge-read a comic about a gay hockey player. I don’t think I’ve ever read a comic, or anything about a gay man, or a hockey player, so I’m
a little surprised. https://www.checkpleasecomic.com/comic/01-01-01
"Lyrics that mean nothing; we were gifted with thought"
-Holding On To You, twenty one pilots
Can’t sleep, thinking about mortality.
I didn’t go to church yesterday, and I regret it.
I might quit all social media and communicate only through email.
"A good thing for you to think about at this stage in life"
Bill Wurtz gives me the same energy as XKCD's Beret Guy.
I can't fit all my Todoist items on my screen at once. Let's go!
My mans is insane. He literally compiled C to WebAssembly (for its simple instruction set) so that he could implement the instruction set
in BrightScript and run C programs. https://motley-coder.com/2020/12/23/doom-on-roku/
Why would I read the documentation? All the documentation tells me is that it's impossible to do what I want to do and it's out of scope and
I need to write an extension.
People say having two dads wouldn't be that bad. But I had a dream last night that I was sitting with my family and my dad came up to the
door from the backyard, so I let him in. And then I realized that my dad already was in the room. I went to the kitchen and got a knife. And we just kind of sat there calmly, but with the tension of knowing that I was going to have to stab one of them and if I guessed wrong my whole family would die. It was pretty terrifying, would not recommend.
I’m brutally curious about everything. I love learning and asking questions and thinking about things. I want friends who are like that.
And they’re really fricking difficult to find.
I haven't been okay since middle school.
Why isn't there an active Count of Monte Cristo fandom? All I want to do is read the Count.
I used to know how to think.
Matthias's guide to getting started with Blaseball!
0. Decide you want to. Blaseball is a simulation where fake teams, with randomly generated players with made-up names play each other. You interact with Blaseball as a fan, watching games through a minimalistic text format. In addition to the rules of B*seball, there are lots of twists that Blaseball adds. For example, last season, one of my team's pitchers became a terrible batter, before they were killed a few games later. The value in Blaseball comes from being able to interact with other fans, much like being a fan of a normal sports team, but more exciting. Blaseball games are played every hour, Mon-Fri, with a postseason on Saturday, and elections on Sunday. This ensures that there's never a null moment, and there's always something weird going on to talk about. 1. You're convinced? Let's go. Head to https://www.blaseball.com and create an account. Then pick a team. I'm a big fan of picking teams with no information other than the name. 2. Join the official [Blaseball Discord](https://discord.gg/3uFgJhu). Read the rules and all that jazz, find your new team in #choose-your-team, and click it. This gives you access to your team's channels. Introduce yourself, this is your new family. Each team runs their channels slightly differently. For example, most teams have a watch-party-channel for discussing on-going games, but I don't know what the name will be for your team. The Discord is the best resource for up-to-date answers to your questions. Remember, no one else knows what's going on either. 3. As I'm writing this, we're on season 14 of Blaseball, there's a lot of history to get caught up on. I recommend [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vQHBzZzaxzI) video for a recap of the first 8 seasons' lore. It's not perfectly up to date, but that shouldn't matter, because no Blaseball re-cap can be, the game just moves too fast. There's an official recap video [here](https://youtu.be/diAHuUV2Meg), that covers through season 11. It was out of date before it was even posted. 4. Watch a Blaseball game. During the season, games are played on the hour, and usually last around 30mins. You can check the [Place Bets](https://www.blaseball.com/upcoming) page for a countdown to the next game. Find where the other fans of your team are watching the on-going games, and cheer a bit. 5. Get to know your players. While watching a game and browsing the Discord for your team, see which players they talk about. The Blaseball Wiki (https://blaseball.wiki, there used to be a Fandom wiki but we don't use that anymore) is lore-based. It has background on every player, like physical descriptions and pronouns. It's put together by fans, through lore chats in the Discord (don't just edit it). 6. Ask your team about mechanics. Blaseball mechanics, like what does Flooding do? or what is the Ego+ perk, are things you can ask about. While they might be mentioned on the Wiki, the Wiki is primarily lore, and our understanding of mechanics is imperfect and changes quickly. 7. Set up your income. This is done on the official Blaseball website in the form of begging, betting, buying snacks, and idoling. The best money-making scheme is re-balanced every season. You don't have to Idol players on your team, and some players have serious perks. Right now, buying slushies is the best, but that's something you can ask about Discord. 8. Explore Blaseball in other ways! Want more background videos? Search Blaseball on Youtube. Want more lore than the Wiki gives? Seach Blaseball on AO3. Want to stay up to without reading message history in Discord? Start following your team on Twitter. Want more interesting live play-by-play? Find someone hosting Blaseball watch parties on Twitch. Blaseball is what you make of it!
Tempted to stay up to watch the start of the Blaseball season.
Back in -4
Happy time change.
I'm not going to look up an explanation for lyrics of "Cyclops Rock." There's probably a metaphor or a reference but I don't want to know.
"I taught you how to cyclops rock, and then you turn around and break my heart. You waste my cyclops time and mess up my cyclops mind" -Cyclops Rock, They Might Be Giants.
Blaseball removes the illusion that sports are interesting to watch because of the skill of the players.
Every so often in a sports game, there will be a moment that exists outside of what the score is or what team wins or loses. If you're watching a basketball game, and a player just full on slugs another guy across the face, you feel that, beyond the 2-pt technical foul. If you're watching a baseball game live with your friends, and your pitcher pitches a perfect inning, in that moment, the score of the game doesn't matter. In Blaseball, if you have the best pitcher in the league, and she gets some stars sucked out of her, it doesn't matter that she's still pretty good. There's a narrative arc. Blaseball is about those moments.
Am I on drugs? Who knows
One of these days Mastodon just isn’t going to be up anymore.
There's a complex idea that needs fleshing out, don't take it at surface level, but it has occurred to me that part of growing up is
realizing the things you imagine you wanted aren't necessary in the way you thought. Like, you can satisfy your desire for x with a small amount and it's not as black and white as a child sees it. The child never buys themself candy. The child imagines that they would buy themselves candy at every opportunity. The child asks the adult why they don't have candy. The adult replies, 'oh, candy isn't healthy' or whatever. But that's not the real reason the adult doesn't buy candy. The child also knows candy is unhealthy. *In saying this, the adult has invalidated the child's desire.* But the adult has bought themselves candy before. I'm not exactly sure where I'm going with this. My idea is that if you give a child unlimited money to spend on candy, they would end up with less candy than they originally imagined or intended. And I don't know if that's true. If it is true, it has serious ramifications, because it implies that "childhood" is inherently characterized by longing for what you can't have (as opposed to say, age, or personality).
I just go whole days without any motivation.
I had a good day today, I unicycled some, I watched some good Youtube videos. The weather was nice, I'm not in pain. But at several points I had the opportunity to be productive, and could not find the strength or energy to do anything. I begin to understand why retirees live so idly.
I want to be free
I am not a tapitia. Post
I'm very tired. I nap now.
Something something my standards are too high I'll never motivate to get a girlfriend.
next to perfection
Light was a mistake. We should go back to before God created light. Yes.
Welcome back to, ruining my sleep schedule for the fun of it, with Matthias.
I had so much I wanted to do today.
The problem with the internet is that they will continue to bash people that don't agree with them so long as those people disagree.
I'm all for trying to convince people, but once you've made your case and I'm on your side, I don't enjoy listening to you repeatedly insult everyone who's not on your side. "Welcome to the club" "What do you do here?" "Well mostly we sit around insulting everyone who isn't in the club" "Why?" "For not being in the club"
Doing Linear Algebra on a whiteboard, listening to "Cyclops Rock" by They Might Be Giants, feeling like it's 2003.
I am only a fan of two things: AJR and the Breckinridge Jazz Hands!
Aahhh! Life is pain
All I have eaten today is a bowl of cereal and a chocolate bar and I feel alive.
Doing a handstand is basically a drug. It just completely pulverizes your brain for a minute.
I am obsessed with Blaseball. It sucks you in. Wow.
Songs that are way better than they have any right to be: “Mike Townsend (is a disappointment)”
"every person has a jazz hand and a worm inside of them, battling for dominance" It's me.
Can't believe we lost Agan. I've only known ███ for a day, but it feels like ███ was the Jazz Hands. A season 1 player.
I'm sure ██'ll do well with the Firefighters. And I'm sure Edric will make a great addition to the team. But it still stings.
"I am the ticker. I live atop the page"
This is a Breckenridge Jazz Hands fan site now.
I'm done. I'm so fricking done. All software is bad, and I can't even criticize it because the KA Extension is garbage as well.
Funky how dictator and dictation are like the same word.
What is a view?
I feel like I’m trying so hard. And I barely managed to pull myself out of bed this morning.
I just want people to listen to me when I tell them something.
I haven't written code in days.
Other than like the couple of lines of assembly I wrote yesterday... I haven't like, committed, in a couple of days, if not longer